Here's Your Gnashing Of Teeth

"A hammerhead shark that gave birth in a Nebraska aquarium reproduced without mating, a genetic analysis shows. "

Here's what happens next: nobody'll hear anything from the Baby Shark for about 30 years. Then the Shark'll become big news again, turning over coral reefs and reprimanding the "Phari-seas" et al. and teaching sharks about loving thy neighbor and turning the other fin and anti-materialism. The Shark will not write any of this down (no time, I suppose). The leaders of the status quo will mock this Shark and render the Shark unto death. Then followers of the Shark will, many years later, write down (with some artistic license) what they remember of it all. More years shall pass, and some sharks of certain authority will edit what was writ, then declare it to be "the unerring word of the Shark." They will say their goal is to bring the message of the Shark unto the common shark (though the common shark will not be allowed to actually read it for a really long time). Somehow this "new testament" will justify the authoritarian sharks dressing themselves in expensive pearls and other such vestments and declaring war "in the name of the Shark" on "non-believers" while simultaneously crying out, "He who lives by the swordfish shall die by the swordfish!"

But When I Talk: Ehh.

The Baltimore Sun recently reviewed Table Manners. Here's what Mary Johnson says about me: "With an expressive face, Boyer [has the] ability to convey emotion wordlessly, and make us laugh while doing so." Not too shabby. Check out the review and a picture of the production HERE.

Today I am Prime

Today is my BIRTHDAY!!!

37 years ago today, I was born in Nassawadox, Virginia. The hospital I was born in no longer exists (replaced by a newer one that stands a few hundred yards to the south). In its place now stand some other medically-related building and, quite appropriately, a playground. When I drive by that area, I like to point at the air above the playground and say, "That's where I was born."

On this day 68 years ago (1939), a 5-year-old gave birth. Really.

You can get my birth-year (1970) from my birth-month (5) and -day (14). 5+14=19, and 5x14=70.

Some more interesting factoids about the number 37 can be found HERE -- including how my age relates to the "Number of the Beast."

(Interesting note: this is post number 69 -- more on that number HERE).

To celebrate my birthday, I hope you will dance. No music required. If someone asks you what you are doing, tell them, "I am dancing in honor of Peter's birthday. Join me." They should. If they don't, give 'em a hug, 'cuz they must be sad if they don't wanna dance in honor of my birthday.

I Like Kipling, Even Though I've Never Kipled

Actor Update: Had an audition today at Imagination Stage for The Jungle Book and for Twice Upon a Time (two stories, The Lorax and The Emperor's New Clothes). Sadly, I did not get called back for Twice Upon a Time -- that's the way it goes, in an actor's life, and it may or may not have anything to do with my reading, but it hurts every time. Happily, I am called back for The Jungle Book, a story I love.

Also, rumor has it that Robert Prosky saw a performance of Table Manners and enjoyed it. I didn't get to see him, though.

And Lately

Actor Update: Table Manners opened Friday at The Bay Theatre in Annapolis. Though the audiences were small – mid-size, the response was very good. Tim King, a local actor et al. who saw a performance, complimented my work. Then he and I spent the next ten minutes trying, unsuccessfully, to figure out where he and I had met before.

Auditions in the past few days: @ Taylor-Royall , for a commercial spoof series (unsuccessful, there); a general audition at Everyman Theatre ; and a callback at Rep Stage for Mrs. Farnsworth by AR Gurney. No responses from ET and RS so far, but that doesn’t necessarily mean anything. The auditions went "fine" and "alright," respectively (definitions of these words HERE).

Saturday, I attended 4 hours worth of a stage combat workshop with instructors Lewis Shaw, Scott Mann, and Chuck Coyl -- “Fast and Furious”-style fighting (a mix of martial arts, street, and other good stuff) and close-quarter knife fighting. Very fun. Took me a little while to shake off the rust, though.

Upcoming: an audition for a couple of shows at Imagination Stage, a place I'm very fond of.

"Taxes" is an Anagram of "Texas"

A blue funk has kept me from posting. Here some math for you: Taxes + crummy weather = blue funk.

The last post was about 20 pounds of puppy ago (would that be 140 in people pounds?). Sadie is 20 weeks old and 45-ish pounds now. Oy. She's also losing her baby teeth. Good -- adult teeth are not quite so pointy. And while she doesn't look broken to me, I'll soon be taking her in to get fixed. Ha, ha.

We open Norman Conquests: Table Manners on Friday. The last week or so of rehearsal have been . . . tense, but I think it'll be fun once we have an audience. By the way, I'm very tired of corn flakes and toast. If you see the show you'll understand why.

Just had an audition today for Rep Stage, which has already garnered a callback next Monday. Wish me luck.

Introducing the Newest Member of the Family

Jen and I adopted a little girl last Saturday. She's a handful, time-consuming, which is why I'm only getting about to writing it now. She was a bit too thin, I think, and had some dandruff, but she looks like she's putting on some weight already and her hair's looking better, too. Her name is Sadie.

Another Little Bite

I will also be involved in an upcoming staged reading of Season of Sentiment, by Harriet Lawrence, as part of Theatre of the First Amendment's First Light Festival. "This story explores traditions, joys and sorrows of Russian immigrants in the 1800s, as celebrated by their American descendants in 1970s suburban Maryland." All the plays being performed are in-process, so we'll get to work on them all week before the reading. Very cool. SoS will be performing on Saturday, March 17 @ 3 pm. Here's the schedule for all the shows. Admission is free for all of 'em.

Also, something else worth checking out if you're local: Howard Community College / Student-Alumni Arts production of OurSpace -- a dance-and-more performance which opened yesterday in the new black box theatre at HCC. It just so happens that Jenny, my "significant other," directed it, and choreographed some of the numbers. I'm the "head writer," so I wrote most of the monologues and dialogue that bridge the performance pieces. Along with dance -- ballroom, modern, ballet, jazz, hip-hop, et al. -- there is "combat dance," musical performances, and some interesting scene work as well. It's an excellent show, and I'm saying that not just because I'm biased but also because it's true. This one's $12-general, $10-students/seniors/groups, "recommended for mature audiences = 14 and up," and will be performing on Friday the 9th (today!), Sat. the 10th, and on the 15th, 16th, and 17th (Th., Fri., Sat.) @ 8 pm.

A Bite

Got one -- I'll be playing Reg in Norman Conquests: Table Manners at the Bay Theatre. Rehearsals start March 26; the show runs April 27 - June 2. I'll tell ya more as we get into it. Very excited!

On the Plus Side, Bathroom Scales Now Friendly